exsiliumlogs | Truly there are different kinds of pain...

Date & Time: November 5th
Location: Somewhere in the moonbase
Characters: Erza Scarlet and Natsu Dragneel
Summary: Two friends reconciling.
Warnings: Feels?

Adjusting to life in the confined space of the moonbase had taken some getting used to. There was no grass, dirt or even wind in this place; the air itself was artificial, created by the complex machines that powered the base. But she had adapted. Then came the attack from those creatures a few days ago, a truly terrifying ordeal. But she had faced that head on. Now that things had quieted down again, Erza was left alone with her thoughts. She thought about her guild-mates and of Natsu and the harsh words she had had to endure to keep them safe. The resentment of the Dragon Slayer was something she knew she would have to shoulder from the moment she had done what she had; and it was the one thing she could not get used to. She had considered apologizing on numerous occasions but she could never think of the right words to make amends for something she knew she would do again if she had to.

And so Erza sat alone near the window in the observation area of the base, one of the few places where one could look out into stars surrounding them. It was quiet here; everyone was likely checking up on their friends or grieving for the ones they had lost. Erza had already checked on her friends and she'd heard from Lucy that Natsu was fine as well. She supposed that would be enough for now...

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He'd needed time. The first day he woke up on the station only to find that indeed they had abandoned the city to their horrible fate, he had been furious. What was worse he could not vent that anger since even the smallest hole in the station could be catastrophic. Lucy explained that to him so many time it was like a gospel now.

But as time went on and he had his chance to think (while safely smothered in Lucy's scent ) and in the end he saw that Erza had made that hard decision even if it was hard for her as well. He was planning to track her down during the mess with the space undead however they never had the chance to. So once things really settled down to the point that he could leave Lucy alone for a while without worrying that some freak would hurt her, he'd gone out and sought out Erza's scent.

Surely enough he found her, looking out into the black canvas of outer space. Natsu paused by the doorway for a moment, wondering what to say first. He'd said and done some pretty bad things towards Erza in retaliation for getting knocked out and forced to abandon the people back on the planet. He couldn't just brush that over with a mere sorry. At least he thought he was out of range of her senses as he tried to come up with a proper opening for a talk. He thought wrong.

The Dragon Slayer's arrival hadn't gone unnoticed, though at first Erza expected him to be one of the creatures; the sword that shifted ever so slightly across her lap confirmed that. As soon as she realized it was a person she turned to greet her new company, however she was more surprised than she should have been to see Natsu loitering in the doorway.

"...Natsu?"

His name came out as a question purely by accident. Was he here by coincidence? Did seeing her here make him hesitant to enter? No, Natsu's extraordinary sense of smell would have warned him of her presence long before he set foot in the room.

"Did you need something?"

Figures she'd notice him. She might not have his keen sense of hearing or smell. But her awareness of her surroundings was just as potent.

"Hey..." Not the greatest start to this conversation but it was the best he could do right now. He stepped inside and let the doors close behind him before approaching.

"I guess you could say that. I've been looking for you since that night at Lucy's place actually." Totally not accusing her of avoiding him. Nope that was not how apologies were supposed to go.

Oh so this probably wasn't about the recent attack involving the monsters. If he had been looking for her it must have been important. She wanted to say she was sorry for not being easily reachable but how could she truly explain her absence? Erza could tell that Natsu wasn't here to be hostile so she gave him a small smile and offered him a seat beside her.

"What is it?"

No it wasn't. In a way that whole mess paled in comparison. After all Erza was part of fairy Tail, part of his family and a dear friend even if scary as all hel sometimes. Natsu blinked as she offered him a seat but he quickly took it and looked ahead out into space before answering her question.

"I wanted to... I wanted to say I'm sorry. For exploding on you after the whole thing with the city getting destroyed." Natsu said and ruffled his hair with one hand in frustration at himself.

"Natsu..."

The apology stunned Erza. She hadn't been expecting that to be the topic even if she had wanted to take this opportunity to make amends. She mirrored Natsu's star-bound gaze and said nothing for a few moments.

"I knew you would react that way, in some way I suppose... I tried to prepare myself for it when I did what I did."

She could weather all sorts of punishment, stand against any foe without fear, but the words of her friends was one her greatest vulnerabilities.

"Leaving all of those people to die without so much as a warning. Deceiving you so that I wouldn't lose any of my own friends. Those were two of the most difficult, and selfish, decisions I've ever had to make."

She bowed her head, fighting the tears that attempted to creep into the corners of her eyes. It occurred to her now that, even in all of her solitude, she had refused to cry over what she had done. Not because she felt no remorse but because it would make the reality of it all so much worse.

"I knew you would never leave, you would have died before that; I couldn't let that happen. I won't apologize for that. As much as I despise myself for it if I had to do it again I would. Even if it meant that you would hate me forever..."

Edited 2013-11-18 20:57 (UTC)

It was surprising. He knew all too well how most people saw him. A rambunctious firestarter who never admitted to being wrong and kept stubbornly to his path. That didn't mean he couldn't grow and mature over time.

He listened to Erza's words before frowning pointedly as he could smell the start of her tears. He bit his cheek and walked up closer. "I know you did it to save me. I know that now. I wasn't thinking straight that time. Erza you saved me from myself. Yeah we lost a lot of people. But we'll just have to get them back. As long as there's chance for that, you shouldn't take it out on yourself like that." That was probably not going to help all that much but it was his honest thoughts on the matter.

"I had no place calling you the way I did. Even if I was angry." Other people should have recorded this monumental moment when Natsu admitted to being wrong entirely.

"I could never hate you forever. You're Erza. My friend, part of my team with Lucy and wendy and Gray. I'd never take that kind of bond back over something like this."

The terrible weight of her decisions disappeared, if only for a moment. Erza should have known better than to question the bond she shared with her friends. Natsu really had no idea what those words meant to her. It gave her hope and something to work toward. She realized that there was a very good chance that the dead would not return, but if there was a chance to make things right she would fight for it with everything she had. If not, well then she would have to be satisfied knowing that she had done all she could.

"Thank you, Natsu..."

And then came her signature sign of affection; she slung her arm around Natsu's shoulders and pulled him into a the gleaming surface of her breastplate. Head meet armor, armor meet head.

Honestly he was still upset about the whole nuking thing and if he had the opportunity to return the favor and wreck stuff for the UE in return, he would jump at the opportunity more than eagerly. And knowing Erza she would likely be right there with him. They all knew how strong her sense of honor and justice was.

"Geez stop apo-"

Oh hell no. Abort. Abor- What followed was the painful sound of his head colliding head on with the metal breastplate.

Truly there are different kinds of pain...

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