[ marduk flashes him a toothy grin. ] That's funny, coming from you. How am I the one that never talks about myself?

[ but... he pauses as he looks down at his hands, forcing them flat on the cover. well. ] Whatever it is also keeps me alive. Hell if I know how it works. [ when he glances back at vanadi this time, his smile falters a bit. ] It's the kind of thing you just learn to live with.