touch fire, just to taste the truth

[implying]

Date & Time: today!!!!! evening.
Location: room 410
Characters: vanadi and poor, unsuspecting marduk
Summary: vanadi is feeling needy and clingy and pathetic, and must inflict it on friends.
Warnings: uhhhhhh vanadi wishing things could get sexy?? will update if needed!

[ He's not wearing his mask tonight. As a result, he's not terribly recognizable as he wanders the halls of the Housing, hands pocketed, huddled into his hoodie. Not very fashionable, a hoodie, but tonight finds him decidedly apathetic about it.

His steps take him to the fourth floor, and from there to the last room. His glance at the number on the door turns to a stare — and shortly after into a knock.

Marduk, he thinks. He's not sure who his roommates are, he hasn't looked into it, but some little cranny in his electricity-driven mind reassures him that his good, dead friend lives here now, since the reorganization. So he steps back to wait, wondering if he has it in him to be properly cheerful when the door is answered. ]

Comments

I TOLD YOU I DID IT!!! HERE IT IS

[applethief]

[ it takes considerable effort for marduk to drag himself out of his room long enough to answer the knock.

it takes even more for him to actually realize it's vanadi on his doorstep. the hoodie alone almost renders him completely unrecognizable, to say nothing of his posture-- but after a few moments of dedicated staring at vanadi's scar face, everything clicks into place for marduk. ]

You look like shit. [ it's as sympathetic as he can manage as he steps to the side, beckoning vanadi in. ]

BABY I'M SO PROUD OF YOU

[implying]

[ The smirk, as it turns out, is instinctive, so that's good. ]

That makes two of us, then.

[ But it falters as he steps in, then falls away with a sigh. That was terrible banter. He adds, a little lamely: ] Sorry. A poor joke.

8DDDDD

[applethief]

[ the joke doesn't bother him; the apology does. marduk slams the door shut as soon as vanadi's inside, then turns around to give him an appraising glance. he can at least figure out that vanadi doesn't seem like his usual inappropriate-slash-cheerful self, but beyond that?

a mystery. marduk reaches out, tugging on the fabric of vanadi's hoodie. ] Something happen to your old clothes?

i hope you cheat the hell out of that system, and never get any work done

[implying]

Mm, no.

[ He eyes that hand for a second or two, resisting — and, fuck it. If Marduk hates it, he'll kick him out, and Vanadi will just go seek the company of someone more accommodating. He moves forward, stepping close, and rests his forehead against Marduk's chest. ]

They're still in my room, I assume. It's been some time since I've been there.

[applethief]

[ his first reaction is to freeze up with vanadi bridges the gap between them, but-- honestly, shouldn't he be used to it by now? relaxing just the tiniest inch, marduk drops his hand on vanadi's head. pats him a little, maybe. it's about the best he can manage. ]

Got locked out? [ marduk is... pretty sure that isn't actually the answer. he clears his throat. ] Do you... want to talk. About it.

[implying]

That's exactly what I'd rather not do.

[ He lifts his head to watch Marduk for a second or two, then decides that even more comfortable than a space-invading lean is to reach up and drop both arms around his neck. ]

Actually, I want to hear about you.

vanadi whyyyy

[applethief]

[ marduk immediately grabs hold of vanadi's upper arms. he doesn't throw him off, but nobody's going to be moving anytime soon. ]

Nah, I'm really... not that interesting. [ he mutters, glancing off to one side. PLS BELIEVE ]

[implying]

Humor me.

[ He smiles, just a little, but the clear discomfort sparks a tiny bit of his usual mischievousness. ]

I mean, truly — you make even me look like an open book, with your caginess. And I'm the man fond of the literal mask.

[applethief]

I'm not cagy.

[ he sniffs, offended. marduk glares back at vanadi, mouth pulled to one side in a frown. ] I just don't have anything to tell you.

[implying]

[ He draws back one of his arms — sympathy for his discomfort? No! Ulterior motive. As soon as he has it back he's lifting it again, gloved fingertips brushing against the bottom right of Marduk's jaw. ]

Where were you born?

[applethief]

[ he opens his mouth, then quickly shuts it again. vanadi's touch makes him grimace, but again he does nothing to stop him. whatever; he's used to it, or... getting there, at least. being questioned is far more distressing, especially when the best way out of it is to just tell the truth...

flatly: ] I don't remember. [ he doesn't volunteer any other information, only staring vanadi down. ]

[implying]

[ oh. :[ well that's no good. He drops his hand again, a small frown in place. ]

Who were your parents?

[applethief]

[ eh-- he fiddles with the collar of his shirt, now staring off at the opposite wall. ]

I don't remember anything from before I died. [ with that, he shrugs. ] Like I said-- not cagy.

[implying]

Oh.

[ ok now he just looks a little awkward. God, how do you make these question politically correct. He finally steps back entirely, glancing around them. ]

Can we sit? [ a beat. ] And are your roommates home? I suppose I'd prefer a closed door, if they are.

[applethief]

[ marduk shrugs again, rubbing the back of his neck. having vanadi be the uncomfortable one for once is less vindicating than he'd hoped it would be. ]

Hell if I know. [ but it's better to be safe than sorry. he motions for vanadi to come with, then slouches off to his room without another word. when they get to the door, marduk kicks it open-- sorry initiative-- and walks in without bothering to see if vanadi followed. ]

[implying]

[ Of course Vanadi follows, how can he not? He invites himself to sink down in an instinctively unhappy lump at the edge of the bed, too. But even then he's watching Marduk, tiredly, pleading even without saying anything.

God, it's embarrassing to feel so needy. ]

What do you remember?

[applethief]

[ he shuts the door and leans against it, hooking his thumbs into his belt. well. ]

Dying's pretty memorable. [ he grins at vanadi, but it fades quickly-- he just looks too miserable. with a sigh, he pushes off of the door, opting to go over to the bed and sit next to vanadi instead. ] Gonna bet you don't really want to hear about that, though.

[implying]

[ There's a second or two where he debates leaning over to kiss him. It might go with an insistent shove at the chest, maybe a straddle, a few more kisses—

Instead, he closes his eyes. ]

I want to know anything you'll tell me.

[applethief]

[ marduk is quiet for a long, long time, he stares straight ahead, leaning forward with his head propped up on both hands, just thinking.

eventually, he sighs. ] I'm just not sure what to tell you-- and it's not that I dont want to. [ he hastily adds, shifting his chin to one palm to look at vanadi again. pls believe ... ] There's just not much I can give you, unless you like reading.

[implying]

[ His eyes open again with that, curiosity taking over for a moment. Writing? But that's right, he definitely remembers some note taking. He frowns a little, but nods. ]

Certainly, I'd be willing to read. [ dang, and he thought his memory was pushing toward faulty sometimes. ]

[applethief]

[ he pauses for a moment; he hadn't expected that vanadi would actually want to, when he offered. well-- he bends down, pulling his book out from under the bed.

marduk straightens back up, and there's another pause. he eyes vanadi, clutching the notebook to his chest protectively. suddenly, this seems like a way worse idea! ] ... You can't keep it.

[implying]

[ He'd be amused, in any other situation. But misery and solemnity both do a good job of staving it off, so he only nods seriously. ]

I won't. I won't even move with it, I'll stay right here.

[applethief]

[ he continues to eye vanadi, trying to appraise his sincerity. the fact that there seems to be some sort of serious, mutual honesty hour occurring is-- more unsettling than any other conclusion could be.

wordlessly, he tilts the top of the book towards him. if that's really what vanadi wants, he can have it. ]

[implying]

[ hey man, don't question it. just go with the flow. Which Vanadi does when he takes the book with a small half of a smile. He takes it carefully, like handling it wrong would snap the spine off, or something, and flips back the cover.

He doesn't quite start in on it, though-- first comes a questioning glance shot up at him. Just to make sure it's all still fine. ]

[applethief]

[ marduk holds up his hands; he's given all responsibility of this up to you, man.

that doesn't mean he's comfortable with the situation, mind-- it's not long before he stands up, tugging at his gloves. marduk isn't sure what you're supposed to do when someone else is reading through your journal, really.

he settles for leaning against the wall opposite vanadi, staring at him as he continues to fidget. go on, then. ]