ladyspitfire: (sᴛᴀʀᴇ | knife into me)
Elissa Cousland ([personal profile] ladyspitfire) wrote in [community profile] exsiliumlogs 2013-10-07 11:33 pm (UTC)

[Her temper and her distress are boiling over. But even in the heat of things, she has to stop and recognize what he says and what he is implying, and how she has been foolish enough to say something hurtful to someone she cares so much about.

He cannot see her but he will hear her stop and turn back, silence settling between them. Elissa swallows back the first retort she wants to give.]


I don't know if you have, Zevran. If you have... That's natural, isn't it? But I don't know. I've never [loved] been with someone like you before.

[Her voice is gentle; she is not trying to demean him. But his view on love is different from Alistair's and who else has she been with that was meaningful?]

You've had lovers. I don't think that's wrong at all. You find joy and pleasure in that part of life. I... Outside of you, I don't think it would bring me the same pleasure you may feel. [Why bother having a night with someone she will never see again, who may die when she leaves the town simply because of association, or because the Darkspawn have followed her?] But that is my choice. It does not make yours wrong or filthy. I don't lead the exciting life you do.

[And if she did, Elissa must also recognize that she would feel sympathy, that she would attach herself in ways that are wrong. Her title as Warden-Commander would gain her immediate respect and many would want to bed her. But that would be a cruel manipulation of her own power, and she will not be like that.]

You haven't said anything wrong. Just know that I'm not interested in anyone else and I would never begrudge you from wanting someone outside of me.

[Better, even. At least he will have someone when the Taint claims her, should they be here for so long.]

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