[She's glad for the kiss, because now she's scared he's going to decide this is it, that he'll finally take that offer she made, for not having to deal with her bullshit anymore. She used to be better than this, she used to be better about herself, but it feels like Exsilium's been chipping away pieces of her until there's nothing left.
It's not always so bad; she was... something like happy, with Ellie, and she's been happy these last weeks with Saul, except for when she isn't. But she can't quite remember how to be as stubborn and proud and strong as she used to be.
And she knows her response still wasn't good enough, that he's just - put all that worry away, but she doesn't want to push it.]
I don't know.
[It's an answer to all three questions, and her voice cracks as she says it.]
no subject
It's not always so bad; she was... something like happy, with Ellie, and she's been happy these last weeks with Saul, except for when she isn't. But she can't quite remember how to be as stubborn and proud and strong as she used to be.
And she knows her response still wasn't good enough, that he's just - put all that worry away, but she doesn't want to push it.]
I don't know.
[It's an answer to all three questions, and her voice cracks as she says it.]