[OPEN] Look out to the future but it tells you nothing, so take another breath.

[hostage]

Date & Time: August 18-25
Location: ???
Characters: Jesse & OPEN to all
Summary: Everyday encounters with one adorable junkie.
Warnings: Well, it's Jesse Pinkman, so drug abuse and spoilers.
Notes: This is a catch-all log. Put the date and location in the subject line.


[Routine. It's one of the first things they teach you in rehab: the importance of routine. The uncertainty of an unplanned day leads to anxiety, which leads to the temptation to use. Routine encourages stability and productivity. No guesswork, no drifting. It's all laid out. You wake up and you know what you're supposed to do until the moment it's time for sleep again.

Jesse is beyond saving when it comes to his addiction, but he still lives by the routine. It's important not because it'll stop him from using, but because it'll stop him from completely losing his mind and hurting someone again.

He doesn't bother with breakfast. He snorts a line of meth to get him going, because god knows that coffee isn't strong enough, and that kills his appetite pretty quick. He's out of the apartment around ten, smoking a cigarette on his way to the lab. Depending on what needs doing, he'll either spend the entire day there or run out to the clinics in town to administer anti-verstatsi drugs to the populace and help measure their progress. Another cigarette replaces lunch. When work is done, he puts in his training hours at the gun range. Then it's time to go home and wind down, which usually involves a joint or a needle or sex or all of the above. Weed helps him stomach a small dinner. He forces himself to shower even when he doesn't want to. He shoots tranq to get to sleep.

And repeat.]

Comments

August 23, the gun range;

[5055034455]

[Saul's working backwards today. Training is usually first in his own daily routine, but he slept in this morning and accidentally threw off his entire schedule — so there he is, squeezing in his mandatory hours much later in the day than he'd like, looking very much like an expert marksman with his earmuffs and shooting glasses and... pistol?

He's broadening his horizons. The gun isn't his; it's on loan from the Initiative's armory, just like the sniper rifle last week and the revolver the week before that.

He's too focused to notice Jesse or anything else, really, and it shows in the way he unflinchingly fires round after round with consistent results: a little off-center each time.]

[hostage]

[A year ago, the sight of Saul wielding a gun would have been hilarious in a not-really-funny way. It's still hard to imagine this clown getting his own hands dirty. Saul used to be the kind of guy who used other people to kill people. (Jesse, for instance.)

How things change.

Jesse hardly bats an eye, now, when he catches sight of Saul as he's on his way out. He stops to observe, although he has very little to say about Saul's form. Mike could probably give some really good advice. Jesse, however, is no expert. And he's distracted by how Saul isn't responding to the recoil. Like, at all.]

Jesus, what kinda muscle you hiding under those ugly-ass suits?

[5055034455]

[Saul can't hear him. It's only Jesse's timing that turns Saul's attention his way — he needs to re-load, and when he bends to retrieve one of the fresh magazines waiting at his feet, he catches sight of Jesse's legs and looks up.]

What?

[Oh, wait. It would help if he removed those earmuffs, huh?]

— sorry. What?

[hostage]

[Oh my god, Saul. Get earplugs.]

The hell gun are you using? It's like you had zero kickback.

[5055034455]

[Oh my god, Jesse. Is it so terrible that he's not a fan of shoving things into any orifices?]

Uh. Just... it's just a normal gun. I don't know the specifics on this one, aside from that it's semi-automatic.

[hostage]

["Normal gun". Good lord. No wonder Saul bought him literally the worst pistol.]

Right...

[5055034455]

[WELL IT'S NOT LIKE HE COULD HAVE GONE TO MIKE FOR WEAPON-BUYING ADVICE.

JUST SAYING.

Saul clicks the safety on, then offers the gun to Jesse for inspection.]

What I'm saying is, it's not the gun.

[hostage]

[Jesse takes the gun, but his attention's still on Saul.]

What do you mean?

[5055034455]

Super strength. Turns out it's a real thing.

[hostage]

Uh, yeah. Duh.

[Wait...]

You saying somebody gave it to you?

[5055034455]

Beat it into me, actually.

[Saul wouldn't blame Jesse if he thought this were a joke, but he looks super serious.]

[hostage]

What the hell does that mean?

[5055034455]

Exactly what it sounds like. I started training with Coby, he kicked my ass, and next thing I knew I was accidentally breaking shit with my bare hands.

[He holds his hands out.

Look at those weapons of mass destruction, Jesse.]

Don't ask me to explain it beyond that, because I can't.

[hostage]

[Jesse arches an eyebrow and then kind of... stares at Saul. For a good long moment. Only he's not just staring. He's doing his superpower thing. Or attempting, at least.]

[5055034455]

[Saul stares back. Squints.]

What are you doing?

[Then he feels it — like he's being drained, almost. And he knows exactly why.]

You little — don't you dare!

[hostage]

[Jesse holds up a hand to shush Saul. God, he's concentrating here.]

Holy shit, dude...

[5055034455]

[Like that's going to work.]

I have not been training my ass off every other day for you to come waltzing over here and do your weird... whatever. How does it even — are you, like, in me right now?

[hostage]

[This look.]

[5055034455]

[If this is what it'll take to get Jesse to stop it with the weird magic shit...]

I mean, I know me being so strong now is a total turn-on, but I just don't like you like that.

[A pause, a slow grin, and if Jesse knows what's good for him he should just exit this conversation right now.]

Then again, this place has opened me up to all sorts of new experiences...

[hostage]

[I hope you like being pistol-whipped, Saul, because here it comes.





But not really. He'll stop before it makes impact. Or... Too hard of an impact. Whatever.]

[5055034455]

[It's too bad Saul hasn't yet figured out how to turn himself to iron or whatever the hell it is, because he would have loved to see the look on Jesse's face for that. Maybe another time.

Instead, he ducks and charges, hauling Jesse up and over his shoulder like he's a sack of twigs.]

Coby's been throwing swords at me.

[Said like, you're gonna have to do better than that, kid.]

So are you done magically probing me now?

[hostage]

[This would be more impressive if Jesse actually weighed more than a sack of twigs. But if Saul's going to be like that, Jesse's going to actually smack him in the back of the head with that pistol he's still holding.]

Are you done being gay?!

[5055034455]

[Damn it, Jesse.

Also: ow.

Saul flinches, but he's also laughing. Because he's an idiot.]

Maybe.

[hostage]

Make that a "yes" and put me down or else I'll take it away and never give it back.

[5055034455]

Tch. So touchy.

[But he'll acquiesce. He sets Jesse down and dusts off his shoulder as an apology.]

Yes, I'm done being gay.