otherwise we might have ourselves

[firstroar]

Date & Time: 10/...something. 10/22? SURE
Location: observatorium emporium
Characters: Collette, Blue
Summary: there'll be no Peter Panning out of these windows :( oh well let's wax quasi-philosophical
Warnings: perhaps more than quasi-philosophical; blue is in this post


Blue spent many years with the word soldier tacked onto his name. It seemed barely a moment had passed before giving it up, and the world had changed so much (into a whole other world, actually) and not-so-suddenly soldier found itself creeping back into what was to him the value of his life.

And for someone who made it a point to remove himself from as many matters of concern as he could without becoming outright blind to his own situation, he was certainly reflecting far too much on himself to feel at all right. Mortality was never too far from his mind no matter the topic, of course, but the more he lingered on his own state of affairs, the less capable he felt in determining the safety and future of others.

Or...past, as it were. The questions he still had about this whole time-travel business made it much more a migraine. It had knit his forehead, reflecting a mildly vexed look back at him as he stood, facing the window and the empty moonscape. Something a number of people did and have done in this short period of time far from the earth.

But what else could he do? That was what he had begun pondering on in the first place. Going over the thoughts in his head once more only made his heart race faster, as each possible threat or success came to mind. It wasn't a foreign feeling, that. And that, at least, was some consolation that he still had a means to try and help.

He certainly hoped so.

Comments

[crocodilesmiles]

It's amazing, the way the world grows and shrinks for a person, depending on the day, their mood, the worries preoccupying them, the people they're striving after. Collette's own world has narrowed of late, a response to unexpected hurts brought on by chance and circumstances no one could predict. Evolution. Was it always for the better? Change prevents stagnation, but mutation is a sort of evolution too. Whether or not its successful depends on a variety of circumstances.

Rolling her way back from the cafeteria, Collette knew her own fair share of thoughts on circumstances. She didn't like leaving Caesar alone for long stretches, but then again, he was rarely alone, was he? Lenalee, Oz, his own roommates and friends weren't going to abandon him right now. Lenalee was... Lenalee. Being tied up in Caesar's own self-blinding made guilt weave into the other girl like some insidious, autocannibalistic snake. It grew only to eat itself, only to grow, to eat itself some more.

It must be a terrible thing, to grow up taught you're the weapon needed to fight off forces more absorbing and unstoppable than yourself. Even being thrust into the heart of a catch 22 in her teen years had been enough of a messy, slippery slope.

She shakes off these thoughts, holding to the upbeat belief that Caesar will see again, sooner or later. If not today, maybe tomorrow. If not tomorrow, next week. If not next week, next month. If not next month, before the end of the year. She can be the loyal one who doesn't leave him behind because his own pride and sensibility (neither one honestly lacking) meant he didn't want people to know. She understood not wanting people to know, to take advantage, or to misconstrue... even pity. Of the many emotions people placed on others, pity was one of the hardest to bear.

Collette looked up from her thoughts, finding she'd paused in the observatory floor, hands tight on her wheelrims. He'll be fine. She belied that with all her heart. It was hard watching him in the meantime. Hard watching someone adapt to a different way of living, because it's been long enough since she'd seen it on a day to day basis.

She recognized Blue when her eyes slid over him, looking toward the windows out on a bleak landscape. Realization took longer to sink in -- she had to shake her head and smile, amused at herself. "Hey, Blue!" A moment of the time of someone she enjoyed. Blue would be a welcome break from other things, someone she wants to feel her best around for his sake, as well as her own. She let that happiness at seeing him rise in her chest. That's something she hopes Mahdi finds, too, the positive emotions coming to the forefront instead of the ones that sucked energy down along with them.

Wheeling herself closer, gliding and noting a certain staleness to the air, she lets her grin grow into a smile. "Do we have Earth rise happening out there right now?"