exsiliumlogs | you've been acting awful tough lately

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you've been acting awful tough lately

Date & Time: The 8th, from 12pm - 3pm
Location: Outside town
Characters: Nill and YOU
Summary: Nill promised to meet an anonymous person on the network, and has decided to send smoke signals with cigarettes to find them. Also action spam.
Warnings: None! Will be updated if needed.

[It's a strange day that finds Nill smoking during daylight hours, but one way or another she's found herself doing exactly that. Small promises made and easy modes of identification, she supposes - she'll end up going through half a pack by the end of this, but it's worth it if she can actually manage to help the person she promised to help.

Even so, it's not difficult to tell that it's a strange sight, a blond girl bundled up, sitting on the trunk of a fallen tree beside one of the better-known ways to town, just... smoking. She doesn't appear to be going anywhere, apparently comfortable where she is, though she smiles at anyone that spares her a glance while they're on their way. She'll be there for most of the early afternoon, from noon to about three, and will welcome anyone that feels like sitting with her.

Hopefully it won't decide to snow while she's sitting there. It's cold enough out as it is, and a new layer isn't going to make her stay terribly pleasant.]

((ooc: Telepathy permissions!))

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[It's a difficult question to answer. Not because she has an issue with it - in this case, she doesn't. She's just not totally sure of the answer, between various time shenanigans and the years being different in different worlds. The easiest way to answer it is probably with her age, but even that's... difficult.]

The last time I was in my own world, I think I was fifteen-years-old.

Right now, I'm about twenty.

[If he thinks about the idea of world-traveling for too long, it becomes something uncomfortable. It's not the concept of it--more impossible things have happened. Rather, it's the method of it that unsettles him so.]

That long? [A beat.] That's a lonely way to move forward.

It's very lonely at times.

[A soft smile spreads across her face, but it's a little sad, too. She takes one more, small drag from her cigarette, and then lets it drop to the ground, where she pushes it into the snow with her boot. She exhales and waves the smoke away again, before lacing her fingers together on her lap.]

...When it first began, I didn't know I was in a world that wasn't my own. They did something to our heads-- A chip, I think. We forgot everything that wasn't there. But for awhile I was happy. I lived with three boys, and it was wonderful.

[She looks up at Kano, and the smile is still in place, but it feels... off. This whole thing feels strange.]

That world fell apart, and we escaped. We remembered our lives.

After a little while longer, they all died-- and none of them came back.

[She lifts a hand, wiping away a tear that threatens to spill before it has the chance.]

Yosuke disappeared, but he came back like he promised he would. He remembered me in his own world, even if it was only dreams. So I need to keep my promise, too.

[A life like that... he isn't sure if he can imagine it. Traveling between worlds, whether or not memories would follow--all that sort of stuff was painful to think about. He'd rather not dwell on it if he could help it while they were here, to leave it ill-defined and distant.

But what he does understand is the promise. And in that instant of understanding, his thoughts wander back to a hazy day blurred by tears.

Promise me--

Something buried deep down hurts at that. Even if it's a promise that can't be kept, abandoning it would be a cowardly thing to do.]

He's pretty lucky to have a girl like you, then! [He's partially teasing her. But, in all honesty, whoever this Yosuke was, he was fortunate to have a friend who would travel this far to meet him again. He hoped that the guy would hold tightly onto her when they met again and remember that.

(don't let him be a liar)]

Well, well... when the two of you meet again, you'll have a lot to tell him, won't you?

[Even Nill doesn't like to dwell on it. It's not a pleasant way to live, but with her life thus far, it's the only way to live. Anything else is...

There are no words. If Nill was offered the chance to go back to her own world, she couldn't take it because it might mean forgetting everything, and the idea of what was more than she could bare.

Kano's a sweet kid, and the partial teasing makes her giggle, even if it's only a little. Despite the implications, she nods, because well... it's true, really, even if Nill couldn't define what exactly they were supposed to be. She still loved him.]

There will be so much to tell him. When I tell him I got to be an adviser to a group, he'll think I'm a comic book hero.

I'll tell him about all of you.

[That's probably the thing that hurts the most right now, honestly. The world she's trying to get back to isn't a good place, and she couldn't stand to try to bring anyone else there with her. When she got to see Yosuke again, she'd say goodbye to... everyone. Kano, Kido, Kaneis, Nico, Jesse and Lisbeth, Stan... Lily and Seras, too. It was the only thing she didn't want.]

...I've never told anyone that.

[There was only one person still alive that was fully aware of it, too.

But she doesn't feel too oddly about it, having told Kano. And Nill realizes, then, that that's part of why she likes him as much as she does.

It's because she's a liar too.]

[He lets out a small laugh in response.] Don't worry.

[Kano tilts his head a little, pressing a finger to his mouth.]

... I won't tell anyone else. It'll be a secret, just between the two of us.

[He hopes that they'll all remember when they go back. It's an unreasonable demand, maybe, but it's all he can cling to.]

[She hasn't seen him do that before, but she gets the feeling it's at least a little normal for him. Something he might be used to doing, even if maybe he hasn't done it as much here.

Nill seems no less grateful for it.]

Thank you for keeping my secret.

[She means it. In a way, Kano officially knows more about her than her not-quite-boyfriend does.]

It's not a big deal, not a big deal at all. [He laughs.] I wouldn't be a very good hero if I didn't, would I?

I think you're a wonderful hero.

[She giggles. Kano was definitely hero material in her eyes.]

I'm glad you can be mine.

[Ah... that actually catches him off-guard. He doesn't hide it quick enough and she can probably catch that moment of embarrassment from him before his eyes cover it up.

It's dumb. But it's been a long, long time since he's saw himself something as other than a monster.]

So... Nill really does believe me. You know, you know, I'm gonna keep reminding you of that!

[Nill absolutely caught that, and she's glad she said it. She's a telepath - she can generally tell what people think of her, even if it's only in small doses. But few others have that luxury, and she when it came to Kano... he was the sort that probably needed the reminder that he was more than he thought he was.]

Of course I do-- if I ever forget, I want you to remind me all the time until I remember again.

[It reminds him of a similar promise Kido made him give. At her earnest words, he can't help but let a genuine smile slip through.]

Then... ah, it's a promise! I won't let Nill forget. I'll be the best hero I can, definitely.

[She's going to make a point to try to get him to smile like that more often. Seeing it now, and comparing it to the ones she's seen in the past... she likes this one much more.]

I promise to remember you, too-- and to make sure you remember you're a hero.

Even when you go home to your cute boyfriend~? He might get jealous, ku ku ku...

[She looks flustered for a second, but now that he mentions it...]

He would definitely be jealous. He was jealous once because I was making dinner with a friend.

[He was a guy friend who was plenty polite but still!!!!

And she totally did not deny the boyfriend thing just then.]

Edited 2014-02-02 04:57 (UTC)

[Oh no. That's a mistake you'll regret Nill.]

Is that so, is that so... should I be hanging out with Nill like this at all, then? Your boyfriend might think I'm trying to steal your sweet heart away~!

[SHE REGRETS IT ALREADY. Her face goes red, and she a second she has no idea what to actually say. She doesn't want to argue against it, because is kind of her boyfriend, sort of. He'd come back for her, and she loved him. It was pretty close, right? she can't go into that with Kano though he'd never stop teasing her about it.

SUBJECT CHANGE? YES SUBJECT CHANGE SUBJECT CHANGE IS GOOD.]

Is it too late for me to be a member of the Dan?

[Please let that be enough of a distraction pretty please.]

Yup. Sorry, membership closed months ago.

[... he breaks into giggles.]

Did you believe me there for a moment? Honestly, honestly, we always have spots open. Nill's more than welcome to be our number fifteen.

[She doesn't know how Kano manages to do that. It's almost impressive. But as soon as he starts giggling, another smile breaks out across her face.

She'd forgotten about there being numbers. She remembers, vaguely, that when the members had first started showing up, that there were probably seven of them in their own world. They'd had membership open on the network of course, but to think that they'd almost doubled their ranks without even a moment of hesitation, and accepted so many people-- even her, who was probably one of the oldest members...

Nill really loved the children from the Mekakushi Dan, from the bottom of her heart.

And 15 sounds like a much better number than 3897981.]

Thank you. I promise I will do my best for you all.

[plus you know also the distraction worked that was pretty cool too.]

[It's a liar's secret.

Kano laughs freely at Nill's response. It was easier to recruit members here, where back home they had been little more than a small family that suddenly burst after their run-in with Momo. Truth be told, it was all beginning to feel much more like...

Home, right? Those warm red days they spent inside their small brick house, before summer had ended. The Dan's grown so large, so happy that he's almost afraid that it'll be gone when he peeks over his shoulder.]

Nill's done just fine as an unofficial member~ She'll do fine as a real member, too, as long as she helps with the chores!

[It felt that way to Nill a lot too. She doesn't feel completely at home in the mansion with the Dan, but it's a lot closer to it than she's had in a long time-- and she really does thrive best with people around than without.

She's afraid of it disappearing. She's sort of accepted that it will-- she knows there's a place she needs to get to and that the Dan members probably need to get back to their own worlds as well, complicated as they might be. She knows that, truly, she just... doesn't want it to happen now. Nill hopes beyond all hope that she'll get the chance to return to the port before the children from the Dan leave.]

I already help with the chores.

[It sounds a little teasing, but very gently so.]

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you've been acting awful tough lately

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