(no subject)

[initiates]

Date: June 1st
Location: The Initiative Hold & Courtyard.
Characters: Everyone.
Summary: New Transports arrive and are shuffled into the Courtyard after their initial briefings. Now with 200% more People-Seeking lists!
Warnings: None.

You've just been hustled and bustled through mazes of information and literal, wide corridors of the Initiative Hold and you've been equipped with your weapon—be it a gun, a sword, or even your existing powers. They've handed you this light netbook and a small pouch of coins (or a debit card, if you're more inclined), and there are several Transports before and after you going through the very same motions. You can hear the Greeter's voice as she walks alongside large groups, telling them all about the history of this place and sharing with you your purpose here in a hurried and urgent tone. "You're in luck that we have enough rooms for all of you; the housing building is getting awfully full. Please, let me show you into the courtyard."

You pass what looks like huge gymnasiums, all with dummies and targets strewn and splayed around the room. Training areas. There are even classrooms, and a few small offices. You're rushed past a large library while the Greeter informs you that you can find almost all your information there, if you've got the time to look—and trust her, you'll have time. You don't spend a lot of time in the bank, and it's a bit of a blur of exchanges with more and more of these strangely-accented and oddly polite-seeming members of the Initiative.

Soon enough, you're in a massive courtyard bustling with all the other Transports. It's not exactly what you'd expect, and it looks more like barracks than anything—huge walls of concrete and stone, separating you from all of the hallways you'd just passed through. It's raining heavily, and dark clouds loom in the air, though it hasn't turned to snow. It's a chill cold, and there are shelters—long cloth hangings that extend from the walls of concrete to house you from the rain, but not enough. Most notably, the courtyard is filled with a marketplace. Even in the cold and the rain, there are several citizens seated at their covered booths and tables, bundled up against the weather. They're selling all manner of their own handmade goods and foods, and citizens and Transports alike are traveling from one small covered shop to another in search of all manner of necessities. Now and then around you you might spot paper fluttering in the faint wind from somewhere relatively dry. It looks like a list.

The Greeter's voice has become so faint now, but you swear you can make it out in the back of the crowds as she tells you, "Good luck. Be safe!"

Her voice is drowned out by the busy marketplace, though even the transactions taking place are somewhat subdued. Nobody is overly happy, really, though most citizens can be found with smiles on their faces. It doesn't seem like they're that shocked to see you, either; even if you're not bound in tattered rags and wrapped in heavy shawls as they are. You're welcome to walk up to a shop, and find yourself something to eat—hey, maybe you'll even find something akin to a raincoat. Or, you can join the others under the coverings against the walls. Where am I? What war? She was talking so fast, and it didn't all make very much sense… did anyone else catch it all?

Welcome to the courtyard. Welcome to the Initiative Hold—and most importantly, welcome to Exsilium.

Comments

[reassures]

[So Saul. You might've missed this girl apparently having a conversation with Jesse over there. And if you did, that's okay! It had been fairly quiet anyway.

However, that's over now, and Nill has decided to make a beeline from Jesse right over to Saul. She lifts her tablet for him to see the text on it the minute she stops in front of him.]

My name is Nill. We need to talk.

[5055034455]

[So this is Nill, the one who Lisbeth described as "particularly volatile to Jesse."

And she apparently doesn't talk.

Great.

Saul peers at her for a moment, expression almost critical, before he nods once.]

Sure.

[reassures]

[With good reason, considering Jesse never ceases to stop being a moron these days. He was always sort of one, but now that he's doing it when it actually matters Nill just finds herself constantly angry at him.]

I need you to tell me how dangerous Walter White is and what he's capable of.

[5055034455]

[Saul knows that feeling.

He scans her message, looks at her, then looks over toward Jesse. Yeah, he saw them talking. And now he's wondering if Jesse mentioned Walt to Nill at all, or if this is Lisbeth's doing, or what, but —

What does it matter?

The more people who dislike Walt from the get-go, the better.

And if this comes back to bite him in the ass someday, so what? What's Walt going to do? Kill him?]

He's manipulative, malicious, and murderous. He's killed people to keep your pal Jesse over there in line. And I know you knew about Jesse's recently-scrapped plan, so let me put it this way: if not for Walter White, even Jesse would never in a million years have thought to do something so stupid.

[reassures]

[Woah woah woah. Wait a second there. What?]

So everything Jesse blames himself for is Walt's fault.

What do you mean "recently-scrapped"?

[5055034455]

Pretty much.

[He cocks an eyebrow.]

Lisbeth didn't tell you? I talked to Jesse. He's not gonna do it.

[reassures]

[Nill just stares at him in disbelief. After all that, after all the horrible things she'd wished upon Jesse for his idiotic decision, after Jesse thought she was trying to make his life and Lisbeth miserable as opposed to helping-- he wasn't going to do it?

It's probably putting things lightly that Nill looks completely livid.]

No one told me anything.

Excuse me.

[That message shown, she nods to Saul briefly before turning on her heel and marching right back over to Jesse.]

[5055034455]

[...well.

That sure was a Look.

Saul calls after her:]

If you plan on causing my client any physical harm, I should let you know there will be legal ramifications...!

[reassures]

[Nill stops midway, and just gives Saul an angry look over her shoulder, wings flared out behind her. It almost looks like something akin to a nonverbal fuck you without actually using the finger for it. Then she just continues on her way.]

[hostage]

[Jesse didn't hear any of what was said, but when he glances up and sees Nill stalking back over with that look on her face, he mentally steels himself. Jesus, what now? Is she mad at Saul or at him? He can't tell.]

[reassures]

[This is honestly probably the angriest that Jesse has ever seen Nill. The usual calm that she managed to keep at least to some extent when angry - even if only to cool off after an outburst - is totally gone. She's so angry her hands are literally shaking at her side.]

Were you going to tell me you didn't plan to kill yourself anymore?

[hostage]

[He's genuinely confused for two reasons: 1) Can't she read his mind? 2) Wouldn't Lisbeth have told her a long time ago? He doesn't even really have an answer for her beyond that. He sits there, dumbfounded, like a deer in headlights.]

[reassures]

[She can read his mind, but this is... the first time she's actually gotten close enough to him to read his mind since that conversation even happened, and he wasn't thinking about that at all.]

Do you think so little of me that you believe I would pry into your head to find out information you aren't thinking about or giving any indication of? When I have no reason to at all?

[The angry shaking is getting worse, reaching to the tips of her feathers. It's blatant in the voice in his head, when otherwise that voice is almost always quiet and put together.]

You must if you think so little of me that you believe I tried to make Lisbeth miserable! That you believe I wanted her to be depressed over you killing yourself, when I was trying to save your life! When she deserved to know the truth and you refused to give it to her!

[Yup, those are angry tears rolling down her cheeks now.]

Lisbeth has barely spoken to me since then, but at least she knows I wasn't trying to ruin her life!

[hostage]

I'm sorry. Please don't... I'm sorry.

[It's not something he's even trying to say. It just keeps rolling around in his mind while he watches her helplessly, not sure what he did wrong or what he's misunderstanding. This isn't even about Nill. He simply believes anyone with the power would go searching through his mind for any scrap of whatever information they wanted out of him. His entire life is one long series of mistrust and interrogation. And people punish him when he doesn't do what they want, so of course Nill tried to separate him from Lisbeth. Yes, she wanted to save his life, and how she wanted to do it was to torture him until he did as he was told and that is how everyone treats him and it says nothing about his perception of Nill. He likes Nill very much and he hates that he's caused her unhappiness and he never meant to mislead her - never knew he was capable of misleading her.

But he can't form words more eloquent than his pleading, and he isn't actually even asking her to stop hurting so much as pleading with himself to stop hurting her.]

[reassures]

You don't torture people you want to save! You don't make the people you want to live miserable! How would that have stopped you from killing yourself in any way?!

[In truth, part of it was because she had wanted to punish him. But more importantly than that, she had wanted him to see the unhappiness he was causing. She wanted him to understand why it was bad, if not for her own sake, then for Lisbeth's. She had hoped beyond hope that he would give himself a chance and just decide to live instead of going on a lengthy suicide mission.

And then-- after that she had planned to-- And Lisbeth knew what Nill was capable and she never once thought to tell her Jesse had changed his mind--

Nill is so completely angry at Jesse, but maybe more than that, she hates that she had planned to kill him if she needed to.

The tears are getting closer to outright cry - her chest heaves ever so often as she draws in a shuddering breath, but that much at least she has decent control over.]

You aren't sorry! If you were sorry you would try to change, to understand why what you did was wrong, but you never do! Instead of acknowledging that your plan was hurtful to everyone that cared about you, you decided I was the source of Lisbeth's misery-- and instead of deciding that Walter White was the cause of misfortune in your world, you took the blame for his decisions on yourself and you kept following them!

If the lives of strangers mean more to you than your own life or the happiness of the people you care about, then why did Walter White's life mean more to you than the people he's responsible for killing?!

[She lifts a hand to wipe away the tears on her face, but on top of angry she's just starting to look miserable herself.]

I wanted to save your life by showing you that people loved you and they didn't want you to die, you stupid, selfish bastard!

[hostage]

[He doesn't know what to do. What she's talking about - about choosing Mr. White over everyone else - was exactly the mistake he was trying to correct. That was the selfish thing. He was willing to do anything so he wouldn't lose Mr. White and it was so wrong of him, so unforgivable, and everyone but Jesse has had to pay the price for that choice. He even escaped a very justifiable, terrible death by coming here. To him, correcting that very first mistake is the only way he'll ever be truly selfless. And he had thought at first literally selfless, to sacrifice himself and disappear in a way that left everyone completely unaware of his entire existence, without knowing his absence, without pain.

The only thing that changed his mind was Saul pointing out to Jesse just how very insignificant he actually was. If not Jesse, then some other minion would have come along, and Mr. White would have taken advantage of that person instead. Jesse's death has not and will never affect Heisenberg. And that's the only reason Jesse's agreed to kill one more person. And even that - even knowing what he knows about Walt - feels like a much more selfish decision than simply disappearing into thin air as if he was never there at all.

He knows that people love him. He also knows that, like Andrea and Brock, they'll be better off without him. He'd really tried to choose the best path for everyone. But he failed.

...Of course he did. When does he ever not fail?]

I'm sorry.

[reassures]

[She doesn't have anymore words to throw at him. There's still plenty of anger left, she's still shaking with the force of it, but she doesn't know what else to say. Even now, saying all this, she doubts anything she's told him has made anything better. Just like before, Jesse has not learned and will never learn. He'll take away entirely the wrong message from this, and if she goes to talk to Lisbeth later he'll think it's some tactic against him, just like he did last time.

And Nill... she's the biggest hypocrite in the world, because a huge part of why she wanted to stop Jesse - why she had considered a dozen circumstances in which she might need to kill him - was for the memories of one person. Not even to keep them alive, because who knew if he even was?

She can't bear to look at his face any more. Instead of breaking his jaw like she had originally been hoping to, Nill lifts a leg and kicks him square in the chest, with the intent not really to hurt him but to tip him and his seat over so at least for a second she doesn't need to stare at him and wish her gaze was as sharp as her knives.]

[hostage]

[He honestly hadn't been expecting that, either. Unbalanced, he goes sprawling back out of his chair and onto the ground. And then he just kind of... sits there, looking in her direction but not at her. If she wants to keep hitting him, that's fine. If that's what it takes. He deserves it, right? What else can he do?]

[5055034455]

[So watching this exchange has been weird enough that Saul didn't want to interrupt whatever was going on (even with the waterworks on display, because let's face it — Jesse's totally a dreamy heartbreaker, or something), but as soon as Nill raises her foot he's on his way over. There is then one (1) unhappy lawyer occupying the space between Nill and Jesse, eyes narrowed.]

What was that I said about playing nice, huh?

[reassures]

[Nill hadn't really intended to do anything else to Jesse, and so she doesn't seem entirely bothered by Saul's abrupt arrival. She might look annoyed if it weren't for the waterworks, but it's hard to actually feel annoyed even if she thinks she should be.

She straightens, and wipes at one of her cheeks. She takes a moment to speak specifically in Jesse's head.]

I have only ever pried into someone's head once, and I did it to help him when no one else could.

[Then, Nill looks up and tries to look Saul as square in the eye as she can manage. She hasn't so much as glanced in Jesse's direction. But they're both on her telepathic wave for this one - she wants them both to hear it.]

I'm a telepath and a mindreader. I am one of the biggest assets you could possibly have when dealing with someone like Walter White. I care about Lisbeth and I will do whatever I can to keep her safe, which means I'm on your side.

Jesse thinks I shouldn't get involved. What do you think, Saul?

[hostage]

[That earns one very sharp look of panic from Jesse, though Nill isn't even facing him to see it. Does she know what she's doing? What if Saul's really still working for Mr. White? What if she just admitted that only for it to be turned against her if he ever shows up?]

[5055034455]

[And Saul looks pretty freaked out, too, because what the fuck there is a VOICE IN HIS HEAD.

Then again, why is he even surprised?

His thoughts scramble for a moment as he assesses the situation. Nill's wording — I care about Lisbeth. Not Jesse. So why is she so upset? It doesn't seem logical.

...then again, why is he even surprised?

He straightens.]

I think you need a time-out. You wanna talk business, that's fine, but I'm not doing it here with the two of you so riled up.

[reassures]

[Nill doesn't even so much as acknowledge Jesse's panic. She waits patiently for Saul to get his bearings, and hey. On the bright side, she's not crying anymore. Totally a decent sign, right?

She stifles a sniffle, her runny nose betraying her. She doesn't say anything else in either of her heads, and instead only offers a nod in return.]

The two of you should talk. Please contact me once you have.

[Only now does she spare Jesse a glance, and it doesn't last long, because immediately after she turns to leave.

If Saul decides to treat her like a child with that time-out bullshit, it'll be one of the bigger mistakes he makes during his time here.]

[hostage]

[Jesse's not about to beg her to stay, either. And the last thing he wants to do right now is talk. He finally moves, though, slowly picking himself up and brushing the dirt from his jeans.]

[5055034455]

[Jesse's in luck, because Saul is also not in the mood for talking. He turns once Nill is gone and scowls.

He's not upset enough to keep himself from dusting Jesse's shirt off, though. He knows how he'd feel if someone put their dirty shoe on him. Rude.]

Remind me later to find out if the library has a copy of How to Win Friends and Influence People.