[semi-closed]

[substitutable]

Date & Time: following the mission in world #1530120; over the course of a few days
Location: in various locations
Characters: the Mekakushi Dan & their acquaintances (see the tags for a full list!)
Summary: The Dan needed to cope and deal with the shock and aftermath of the mission, mostly privately but that is a lot of one-on-one talking so we're putting them all here instead of making a gazillion logs.
Warnings: Talks of death, talks of insecurities, a lot of sad talking.

The mission is over, with one world lost, and a dan member they thought they lost came back thanks to the workings of the Initiative. But everything is only fun and games until someone loses a life once, and now the members of the Mekakushi-dan must deal with their shocking encounter with reality. Maybe they're lucky that they still have each other and their friends to turn to. This post is prose and action spam friendly!

Comments

[concealingeyes]

[Kido reaches up and curls her fingers over his cheek. Even if she told him he doesn't have to smile for her, he'd probably just try harder.]

A good leader wouldn't have abandoned you. If Shintaro hadn't been there, then what...? [She shuts her eyes.] ...Basically, I died because I made a stupid mistake and had to fix it.

[She thought about it earlier. If she hadn't gone off to scout in the first place, she would have been able to hide them. Just shows how unprepared she is to lead them now.]

[duplicitoussight]

But he was there. [It could have been worse. So, so much worse. But he won't think about it. If they dwell on it anymore, they might never find any rest. He rests his hand over hers and squeezes it, laughing a little.]

Don't you think coming back from the dead is enough work for you?

[concealingeyes]

I didn't do anything... I just woke up and waited for you to come for me. Thanks... for always coming back for me.

[duplicitoussight]

... I promised, right? 'I'll save you from disappearing.' I said something along those lines, if I remember. If I didn't... Kido would've been upset at me.

[concealingeyes]

[Kido starts to relax, if only a bit, breathing softly.] Making that promise really meant a lot to you, didn't it?

[duplicitoussight]

[That's good. Her relaxing relaxes him as well.] Of course it did. Why else would I keep it? It was important to Kido, so it's important to me, too.

[concealingeyes]

You're ridiculous. Most people wouldn't still care about something they said as a kid...

[But her tone is warm and she smiles for him.]

[duplicitoussight]

[Seeing her smile brings some normalcy back to the situation. He leans his head into her hand this time.]

Ah, what can I say? I'm an idiot through and through. I can't help it.

[concealingeyes]

[Her smile just strengthens. Right now, she can be okay. She can't forget how much today terrified her, how it won't leave her, but she looks at him and thinks his skin feels soft when she brushes it with her thumb. If he can relax, maybe she's not such a bad leader after all.

No, more important than that, if she can see him relax and smile for real, she can be a good friend.]

Yeah, but... you're my idiot. I wouldn't change anything about you.

[He might not believe her but it's true. She already loves him. He's stupid and a liar and he hurts her sometimes but he's also the one who makes her smile, who finds her when no one else can, who has faith in her even now.]

[duplicitoussight]

[She looks beautiful when she smiles. It's stupid and selfish, but that's the only expression he wants her to have--not just for the world, but for him, too. Seeing that settles the fear in his heart a bit. As long as he can see that smile, he knows that they'll be okay.]

... I would. [Almost everything about himself, in fact. He smiles back at her.] For example...! I'd like to be taller.

[concealingeyes]

[She slides her hand up to run her fingers through his hair, shaking her head slightly.]

It's more fun if you're shorter than me. At least you're taller than Mary and Kisaragi, right?

[But she wants him to know something.]

...You're not without your bad points, but don't think like that. Please. [Kido's voice goes softer.] I wouldn't put my life out there like that for someone who wasn't worth it. So stop thinking you're so terrible. Just for a little while. If I let you take care of me, will you believe it? Even for a day...

[It's too much to ask him to care about himself like that, to see himself like she sees him, but it hurts too much after realising she really would die for him so willingly.]

[duplicitoussight]

[He didn't mean for the focus to turn to him. He isn't worth that attention, in his opinion, but he won't shove her away this time. When he saw her fall, all he could think of was how he had hurt her, how he had spun her around and around with his lies until she wasn't sure if what he told her was the truth. He left her clouded with doubts. So... now that he knows how easy it is to lose her... he can manage to be more honest. One last little lie, then...]

I will. [His voice is just as soft as hers.] I will, if Leader smiles like she did earlier for me.

[concealingeyes]

[If she stopped and wondered if that was a lie or not right now, she might start crying again. She wants to believe in him. So the smile comes, brighter than she should be capable of after today, but she can smile with him.]

You don't have to ask me to smile, idiot. It just happens when you say things like that.

[duplicitoussight]

[He laughs.] When you put it that way, it makes you sound lovesick. I wonder, I wonder, is our brash leader becoming a sentimental girl?

[concealingeyes]

Tch... I don't want to sound gross.

[She sighs, her hand dropping from his face. She slumps back against the couch.]

Anyway, I'm not the leader right now, so whatever I say or do for now doesn't matter towards that. But you're number three, so...

[duplicitoussight]

So what? [He knows what. But the numbers seemed to have lot their meaning after the mission. Number one, number two, number three... no matter how they ranked themselves, they were all on the same level of helplessness.]

Ah, you aren't suggesting that I take over, are you?

[concealingeyes]

I'm not suggesting it. I'm saying you will. [She keeps her eyes shut to focus. The smile he earned might as well have not been there.] Just do that for me at least.

[duplicitoussight]

[Leading isn't his forte. Being nosy and lying are. But he can't exactly refuse with her like this.]

Is Leader sure? No, no, actually, if Leader says it, then it's an order, isn't it? [He sighs.] I'll probably go mad with power, but I'll accept the role.

[concealingeyes]

You'll do fine. You're better at taking care of people than you think.

[duplicitoussight]

... well, if you say something like that I can't argue.

[He scoots closer to her, leaning against her side.] ... if I'm the temporary leader, does that mean I can boss Kido around now?

[concealingeyes]

[She cracks an eye open to look at him before letting herself lean against him. Really she should say no but she did put him in charge. If he says something, she can at least listen. He probably won't ask much of her right now anyway.] ...I guess if you give me an order I have to consider it seriously, depending on what it is...

[duplicitoussight]

All right, then. My first order as the Mekakushi Dan's temporary leader is that all desserts go to me from now on.

[concealingeyes]

[She groans. Is this mad with power?] I think Kaede will kick you if you do.

[duplicitoussight]

Fine, fine. How about... you share your bed with me!

[concealingeyes]

When you say it with that kind of tone, it's going to sound like a joke.

[Despite saying that, she wonders who that 'order' is for? Her or him? Either way, the idea of being apart right now, just the short distance of their rooms, squeezes her chest and she nods.]

...Order accepted.