[open] you've got to stop lying still because this is no kind of life

[motherofnemesis]

Date & Time: May 21st-31st
Location: group housing, the memorial set up in the garden, the rooftops at night, anywhere else you would like
Characters: Max & ANYONE
Summary: Well that sucked, raise your hand if you agree and just want to chill out.
Warnings: references to past violence

o1. home. 21st.

[ She lingers down in the lobby of the housing for a while, too unsettled to willingly put herself in the same room with people she really doesn't want to mess up or if Tony's just gotten back with the relief that will be associated with that. So for a while she simply paces in the lobby, back and forth, but eventually she has to admit that her clothes are still bloody and she could really, really use a very hot shower and about 20 hours of sleep, and now before her head ceases to feel like it's filled with white noise and decides to actually react to everything that just happened and how many people died around her.

So she finishes up pacing, slings her coat over her shoulder and heads back up to the room. ]

o2. garden memorial.

[ In the moments over the next week that she vanishes, she can sometimes be found in the memorial Gwen has been working on setting up and the nearby garden. Weeding is easy, repetitive, and she's got enough to handle in her head with the increase in - charge she's come to recognize as the aftermath of a mission.

If sometimes she simply sits with her arms around her legs and forehead resting on her knees, tired and sore and with her own people to remember, well. There's rarely others around, after all. It's fine. ]

o3. nighttime rooftops.

[ She hasn't done this sort of work in a while, and the crime levels in Exsilium really aren't that high. Frankly it's a little ridiculous that she keeps roaming the streets at night in the vain hope of finding some sort of situation she can fix, especially since she can't even be bothered to wear some sort of costume. She just would really like to fix things, a little, instead of just maintain a sort of terrible average.

Sometimes she really does miss this. ]

o4. anywhere.

[ There's a lot of wandering, going on. Sometimes she's in the training room, though her time there is short and she's careful to stay in corners and out of the main lines of sight since Kara and Lee clearly know where this is. She spends a fair amount of time in Tony's workshop, building new and improved ways to damage the United Earth soldiers because she needs to. And sometimes she's just moving, restless and uncertain of what she's doing but knowing that she can't be still. ]

[ ooc: permissions are here for empathy things, which could be a good idea since it's currently in the process of leveling up! there's a strong chance of tags becoming sporadic in the next few weeks again, but i will backtag everything forever. ]

Comments

2

[oldsoldiersneverdie]

[Even with his shields in better shape, it's still good to be outside, some. And this little garden was nice, particularly right now - a reminder that new things could grow from ruin. Something he really needs to keep in mind right now. Thinking it quiet enough, he's picked it as his spot for meditation for the day - which for someone trained by the Askani means floating upside down a few feet in the air in lotus position]

[motherofnemesis]

[ Outside has been one of her favorite places for a long time, and this garden in particular is rapidly growing to be one of her most favored spots for peace. She's definitely familiar enough with it to take in the sight of someone else in it as being out of place.

Not to mention the floating upside down in the air thing. That's also pretty out of place. ]

So you can - float? [ A beat, a cautious widening of her empathy to see if she can get any surface read from him. ] Why upside down?

[oldsoldiersneverdie]

[The brush of psi-power hits him before the words do, and while he's pretty much radiating calm, his shields are also right there, and at the little prod, he... well, prods back. Not a full psi-attack, but acknowledgement, a testing of defenses. At the same time, he opens his eye]

Discipline, mostly.

[motherofnemesis]

[ She pulls in her empathy almost immediately at that test back, shields slamming up instinctually. They're not as thorough as they could be, clearly cracked from previous great strain, but they're not bad anymore either. ]

How does hovering upside down help with discipline?

[oldsoldiersneverdie]

It takes a lot of TK control to hold steady like this. Holding that while letting the rest of your thoughts go requires even more practice.

[And then he adds, mentally:] Your shields could use some work. [He could probably smash through if he tried, but not only would that be incredibly rude, it'd probably be painful for both of them]

[motherofnemesis]

Telekinesis? [ But not entirely waiting for an answer. She's fairly certain she's right about that one. ] Seems like a one way trip to getting dropped on your head, you know.

[ Her mouth thins at that, though, shoring them up further as she can. She's never fond of that being pointed out to her, given the reasons why. ] If you've got something to say, you can say it out loud.

[oldsoldiersneverdie]

Yeah. [To both those first statements really] When I first learned how to do this, I practiced over grass - falling on your head is a pretty good incentive to push yourself, though.

Sorry. Too used to psis who prefer speaking mind-to-mind, I think. [Though it's clear enough she heard him, so he doesn't bother repeating himself]

3

[demonbloodblade]

[Max, on the rooftops, comes across someone sitting there in what look to be older Army fatigues, looking out over the city, getting damp in the slight rain, and drinking sporadically from a bottle of rum. The arm not holding the bottle is heavily bandaged, and the person in general is not looking terribly happy.]

[motherofnemesis]

[ She thinks a lot of people are probably drinking after that whole event. She's chosen not to, not after the massive hangover and general idiocy that followed her extensive bender after the panic of the spaceship's crash, but she more than understands the urge. There's a long moment of silence, and then she takes a step forward. ]

It's warmer inside.

[demonbloodblade]

[Max's empathy picks up anger, self-loathing and sadness; the person turns to look at her.]

Penance isn't supposed to be pleasant. Out here I can be cold and wet and get drunk and have a horrible hangover while I pray for forgiveness. Which is probably completely wrong, but at least I'm suffering for it.

[She regards the bottle.] And this stuff. Why do people drink it? It's terrible, and almost a penance in itself.

[motherofnemesis]

Penance?

[ That's - interesting. The anger and the sadness she gets, sure, she thinks most of them feel that way after the recent fiasco, but the self-loathing is harder to figure out. ]

They drink it because it helps them forget, mostly. Why are you doing penance?

[demonbloodblade]

[She takes a deep breath.]

Back where I'm from, I follow the god of protectors, guardians. My place is to stand between innocents and harm. I was raised by priests of that god. and I failed. I was one of the first team and failed to consider the possibility of problems. I failed to protect the people of that world. I failed to stop Adam and all he did. I failed. Completely, utterly. I failed in everything my faith tells me I must do.

[the self-loathing swells]

I don't even have the courage to tell someone how I feel about him. and even if I did, who could find this worth caring about? [she gestures at her face.] I should have just died - when I was born, in those fights, it doesn't matter at all. does it?

[she throws the bottle over the edge, with a wordless scream]

[motherofnemesis]

[ She just listens for a long moment, stolid and steady. Almost she'd like to try to calm her with empathy, force her into some sort of acceptance, but that's the fake kind that doesn't last. It wouldn't actually do anything for her in the long run. ]

I don't think drinking's what you need tonight. [ It's just an exacerbation, really. ] Everyone failed to protect that world. It was impossible.

If there's such a thing as a god and they don't realize that, they're no god worth following.

1

[alittlesweptup]

[It's late in the evening and after a day filled with being on foot, the pop of weaponry and the sharp smell of burning (flesh and plastic and god knows what else) that it's probably shit awful rude of him to come visiting unannounced, but that doesn't stop him.

The thud of Charlie's knuckles on the door in the otherwise bone quiet hallway is loud enough that he startles himself.]

[motherofnemesis]

[ On the list of things she was expecting, someone knocking on the door really wasn't one of them. Normally she'd just let Pepper or Tony get it - it's almost certainly for them anyways, not her - but she's already out in the kitchen, bloodied coat hanging over the back of a stool as she heats up soup and makes toast, and so she heads over to open the door. ]

Charlie. [ Definitely not what she was expecting, and she glances backwards at the room, down at herself (she should have done the shower first, food second), before stepping back to let him in. ] Wasn't expecting you. Want some soup?

[alittlesweptup]

[From the looks of it, it's clear Charlie's at least had the opportunity to shower and change. In fact if it wasn't for the slightly vacant look to him, he might look fresher than he has in months.]

Sure. Soup sounds lovely.

[motherofnemesis]

[ Lucky sod. Except for that expression on his face, which she's not fond of. For the first time in a long while she actually wishes she had her empathy, could test how he is and maybe help.

But that's not an option right now. ] Soup it is then. I've got chicken soup and beef stew. You doing okay?

[alittlesweptup]

Oh yeah, just cherry. [He sidesteps through the door into the apartment, shoulders hunched.] Either sounds good.

[He pauses, feels bulky and out of place in the flat. Not that it was any better in the hall either. Maybe the problem's his skin.] You look like shit.

[motherofnemesis]

[ She turns on the stove, stretches and turns back to look at him, considering. ] Thanks. You're looking great yourself.

[ Grabbing her coat off the chair and heading towards her bedroom with a gesture towards the couch. ] Gimme a minute to change. Grab some water if you want it. Or a drink, there's vodka on the counter.

3

[mach_n_roll]

[She's not the only one who likes to run around the city and wishes there were easier problems to solve.]

[Sonic isn't used to this. He's used to nice, simple problems that don't require making the situation worse before it gets better. That just doesn't happen in his world, not like this! But between the battle recently, and what happened back in the Bangkok mission, he's starting to feel like there's nothing they can do that will actually improve this world.]

[On her rooftop lookouts, she may see her. Or he may surprise her, he's certainly fast enough. Either way, he has on a genuine-looking smile at seeing the stranger up there with him:]

Hey. Great night, huh? Well... Heh, great as this place can get, I guess.

[motherofnemesis]

[ She's been thinking some rather similar thoughts, but tonight they've certainly been interrupted by his appearance and the fact that he's smiling.

He's smiling, and he means it, and that is rather unsettling. People on rooftops at night don't do that. ]

It's decent, I guess. What are you up to?

[mach_n_roll]

[He never really stops smiling, is the thing. No reason to. He shrugs and hops down from the rooftop hutch he'd been standing on.]

Just goin' for a run around the city. Great way to clear a guy's head, you know?

[motherofnemesis]

[ She can think of a lot of reasons to not smile, really. Quite a few. ]

This late at night?

[mach_n_roll]

Why not? If my mind's racing, I wanna be too!

What about you?

[motherofnemesis]

Your mind's racing this late at night?

{ shrugging. ] I'm a night owl. Always have been.