[open] eyes on your goodbyes

[firstroar]

Date & Time: Dec 5 - 20
Location: Moonbase
Characters: Blue, you
Summary: Can't shake those watcher ways (DEETS)
Warnings: ? notify me


While some rushed, leaping at the chance to leave, Blue lingered with the hesitant and stubborn who held back for a time. It wasn't for lack of curiosity; the artificial intelligence had given him the footage of life back in Exsilium, the possibility of life and continued hope. Fresh hope, even; who knew who was waiting for them below?

But after the whirlwind of conflict and mounting frustrations that suffocated the hold wall to wall, Blue longed for the chance to breathe again. And, in the same way one finds relief in opening the window of a stuffy house, Blue's mind and heart could feel refreshed...and itself again. It was easy to get lost in the emotions of others, so packed together and so heated; he needed time to recollect himself.

Recollect and reconsider. Collette had been right; it was time. And Gamora was right, too – there was too much chance for sinking back into the stagnant routines, broken up only by more disaster. He had a window of opportunity to consider, and it wasn't one to keep to himself.

The air of hope that came with the exodus bolstered the notion, and Blue, more himself again, could turn outward once more and consider these strange and fascinating people around him. It would be more on them than him, truly. He knew that. But he didn't know them.

So, by lingering as others prepared to leave, he gave his attention to the swirl of changing moods and thoughts, to the passing conversations and dreams around him – all the things within the reach of his mind. A little further than that, to those he deemed friends; their well-being mattered more than his, after all.

Comments

*open | december 5

[crab]

[ by virtue of his sylladex, packing was never an issue for karkat. he holds no love for the moon, either, and the unpleasant memories its corridors call up. so then, why hesitate in returning (or arriving for the first time, in his case) to the surface?

because it's not where he wants to be. for the initiative, for exsilium, for its inhabitants, for this entire miserable universe, karkat nurses a poisonous resentment, a resentment only deepened by the recognized fact of its pointlessness. this dragging his feet will get him nowhere, won't make him feel better, won't return him to the city or reattach him to the alpha timeline. he cannot stay on the moon in some silent protest of his abduction. he can, however, be as surly and ill tempered about the entire process as he can possibly manage -- and he can manage a lot, snapping at people in hallways for things like walking too loudly, breathing wrong, and generally treating anyone with the misfortune to be existing in his vicinity with unnecessary amounts of ire.

he has never been doomed before, and the experience is a sour one. ]

[firstroar]

[Blue has navigated his way around crowds of emotion for hundreds of years, but old age and closed-quarter conditions have a way of compounding and making it a struggle. it's one thing to spend life around minds similarly sterilized by unfeeling machines, very much another to find yourself in an ocean of free-flowing thought from a dozen-and-more worlds.

this trickling away of those minds? it will come with its share of relief. Blue could walk here and not feel crushing weight on all sides.

THEN THERE'S THIS GUY

but turning a corner at the wrong time brings him face-to-face with one of the densest clouds of negativity a single body could emanate he's felt. it holds him back and makes him stop, like some kind of invisible barrier, while his eyes drop and find the short, crabby source.]

[crab]

[ karkat hadn't been expecting someone to turn the corner, and as a result comes very close to walking smack into blue -- he draws to a halt, takes a few hurried steps back, and glares up at him with an expression appropriate to having been personally offended in some way. ]

And what do you think you're staring at, buttcrumpet? [ he snarls. some part of him is aware that taking his existential misery out on the transport population is not the most ideal coping mechanism, but the rest of him reasons that the transport population can go fuck itself, he's not a transport, he's an import. ]

[firstroar]

[all that unpleasantness redirected at him is worse than the unpleasantness itself. it's very...new, too; something this palpable would be hard to ignore for the weeks they've all been here.

first, he moves, stepping aside to allow him to pass should he wish.]

Someone new. [his eyes lift from Karkat himself and glance more at the gloomcloud around him.]

[crab]

[ of course, to karkat, it simply looks as though blue has decided to gaze off into empty space, which gives him a certain amount of pause. he sort of wants to find a way to be offended about that, too, but it's difficult considering he did just open with a complaint about being looked at. possibly he's just trying to be polite? god dammit, that's not the way he's supposed to react. ]

Yeah, I dunno if you noticed, but about fifty of us materialized up here sometime last week. Unbelievable, I know. [ is his slightly less aggressive retort.

the gloomcloud is not what you would call palatable to browse. the foremost emotions that make it up are those of anger, resentment, self loathing and bitterness. these are the easiest emotions to feel, the safest ones to express; beneath them are the more vulnerable emotions, such as sadness, loss, grief, fear, insecurity. it is also not consistently directed at blue -- more often than not, it turns inward, attempting to cannibalize its origin. the sheer depth of karkat's self loathing is ever apparent. ]

*open | december 10th?!

[gamora]

( she's not leaving. she's not leaving and she's not really thinking about everyone who is in the way that people in denial don't think about the things they're in denial about.

instead she's enjoying the increasingly empty moonbase - stalking through it with her cape billowing out behind her and her sword strapped to her back like always. or at least almost always, because today finds her cape and swordless in the observatory, gaze not focused on the departing spaceship but on the stars.

it's cruel, gamora thinks, that she could be so close and yet so far from what she knows. away from humans and everything that makes her feel like an outsider like she never had before - even as the last of her species.

the sooner everyone else was gone, the better. )

[firstroar]

[Gamora's lighter mood isn't going unnoticed by Blue, naturally; she's hard to miss, given their acquaintance and his own senses.

he hesitates, deliberating on leaving her with her thoughts. but there's just the weakest trace of loneliness to be gleaned in the mood inside the observatory, and he can't help but wonder about it.]

It's a relief, isn't it? [he walks her way in his own time, a pace slow enough to be stopped if he catches whiff of leave me alone.]

[gamora]

( she doesn't move from where she's standing - the only sign that she's acknowledging his presence is the crossing of her arms. It's not a defensive action, even if it takes her a moment or two to respond. )

They can't leave fast enough.

[firstroar]

What will you do, then? [coming to stand just a short step away from her side, watching her reflection.] Once everyone's left.

[gamora]

Same thing I've been doing. ( A beat, and Gamora's eyes flicker to Blue for a moment or two. ) Quill'll come up with something to do that isn't Initiative approved, and with Rocket we'll have more firepower.

( It's slowly getting brighter for Gamora, in terms of people she knows from her own universe around. )

FOR BLEU crawls in here late

[khajidont]

Even with so much conflict weighing them down, it was hard not to feel some relief at the acknowledgment that people were now able to leave. For all that he resented being stuck in space, Jaime had become accustomed enough to it, and his relief had everything to do with the easing of tension of those around him. He wasn't planning on sticking around, but even wandering the halls of the moonbase was a far lighter affair, particularly when everyone else began to clear out.

He had never been one to particularly enjoy solitude - not that he was ever alone anymore, not really, not with the scarab's comforting presence forever lingering at the back of his mind - but after the past month, it made the moonbase feel almost cleaner, brighter. With two of the people he most wished to speak with gone (something he was trying his level best to ignore and avoid, these empty spaces where Helena and Sango had been), it wasn't a terrible thing to take a couple days for himself, away from the surly looks and heated arguments that dominated the network and the hallways alike.

Though today was the day of his departure, the shuttle wasn't going to leave for a couple hours yet, leaving him time to sit at one of the empty cafeteria tables with his duffel bag resting on the table in front of him. He had few important possessions on him, and there was no way he was going to leave the book with Ted's notes and his family pictures tucked inside behind, but he still unzipped it every now and again, making sure that they were still there.

opens arms

[firstroar]

"Jaime."

Blue's senses were nowhere near as acute as the scarab's, but he always had the talent for picking out familiar people from a fair distance. If thoughts and feelings were a vapor or something to be described as sound, then the fog and noise that came from the vast number of people living together so closely (and unhappily, for the most part) clearing made it all the easier to find something resembling a friend.

He approached, his expression mild but curious, watching the boy fidget with his belongings.

EMOTIONAL EMBRACE

[khajidont]

"Hey, Blue."

Jaime took his hands off his bag as Blue approached to rest them on the table, as if to finally still himself, but his hands drummed idly on the table anyway. A combination of his anticipation for the trip ahead and the time spent cooped up in the moonbase made it frankly difficult to stay still, whether it manifested in the fidgeting of his hands or the restless thump of his heel against the metal flooring.

"You didn't bother clearing outta here with the first wave down?"

celine dion softly plays

[firstroar]

His head shook once before he turned himself to sit, back against the edge of the table. It put Jaime's hands farthest in his peripheral, but not wholly out of sight; they weren't what was most important to pay attention to.

"I will stay here for a time," he said. "It seemed the better choice for myself and those down below."

neeear faaar whereverrrr you arrrre

[khajidont]

"Oh yeah? Why's that?" Jaime paused in his fidgeting, resting his chin on his fist to look curiously over in Blue's direction. He had the vaguest impression that it wasn't the greatest idea just to abandon the place, but it was difficult to concentrate on it with the prospect of Earth waiting for them just a few hours away.

*open

[inafadingcrown]

[Galadriel's mood has improved a great deal since her husband's arrival. And why wouldn't it? A burden shared is a burden lessened, so they say, and he is the only person who she will trust with the entirety of her thoughts. It was not that her work was done, but rather that she had found more strength to help her with it.

So she busies herself with packing her own things and what herbs and medical supplies that she might carry with her. And in her free moments, she takes the time to admire the clear view of the stars. That is one thing that she will miss.

And naturally, Blue's attentions do not go unnoticed. There's a touch of amusement when he finds her mind- like someone unexpectedly finding a friend at their doorstep. The rest of her thoughts are as carefully contained as ever, but her improved mood does still manage to shine through. Hello, friend.]

[firstroar]

[she comes to him like a distorted reflection: what she has gained, he has lost, and while she looks fondly out at starry horizons, he watches them with trepidation and years-old dread.

and her, too...radiant even in thought, while he can't help but grow meek; her impact is still strong, despite reassurances and time passed by.

it comes as a surprise, even if it shouldn't, given how easy it is now to let his mind wander without being smothered by the receding.]

Galadriel.

[even the name brings notion of light.]

You're still here...

[inafadingcrown]

For a time, at least. I have a few preparations to make before I leave this place. [Before she leaves the moon, that is. She'd rather be talking about going home, but that's a long way off. That's alright. She's patient.]

Do you intend to remain here?

[firstroar]

[from where he stands, he still tilts and turns his head toward the direction he perceives the thought.]

For now, yes. I decided it was the right thing to do.

[inafadingcrown]

It is perhaps best that we do not all leave at once; I am reassured that at least one who I deem capable will remain. But it has been too long since I have felt the sun on my face and the wind in my hair. [Living on the moon is hard for an elf. She can do it, of course- Galadriel is nothing if not hardy. But it's hard enough on her heart being away from Arda, let alone any sort of natural environment at all.]

Blue | early Dec sometime I guess?

[oldsoldiersneverdie]

[A little part of Nate was hesitant to leave the moonbase. With the last few weeks of events, he desperately wanted a breather, some space apart to collect himself, to let down his guard. But Raiden and Sunny were going back down, and he was loathe to abandon them. And he knew it would be easier to stage missions from planetside.]

[firstroar]

[Nate's emanating a particular kind of hesitation Blue himself is familiar with, and it's hard to pass by.

his presence manifests first as a gentle hand on his shoulder, while he himself lingers in the hallway. Nate can easily shrug him off if he wishes to be alone; Blue understands.]

[oldsoldiersneverdie]

[In among all the chaos of moving, Blue's presence was a welcome one - Nate always felt calmer when the other telepath was around, and he welcomed that calm with wordless thanks]

[firstroar]

You can stay for a time, Nate.

[he steps closer as he says so.] There's no danger to rush away from here.

[oldsoldiersneverdie]

I know, but... [The mix of emotions is a familiar one to him - the pull between what must be done, and what he wishes he could do. Even in a different world, the burdens of the Chosen One haven't vanished]

There's so much to do.