[ open ] as cuddly as a cactus, as charming as an eel

[devotedtothecore]

Date & Time: December 24th (backdated), sometime in the morning onwards
Location: The Museum of Old and New Art
Characters: An assortment of current residents of the creepy castle
Summary: Ill-timed maintenance, i.e. The Unintentional Ruin Of Christmas
Warnings: None!

Though it had taken some elbow grease and a certain level of penguin bloodshed, the castle has been a veritable haven of heat and light for the last couple of weeks, what with the presence of a surprisingly robust (and reasonably intact) geothermal power generator brought online. The snowy days have passed in relative calm since, though once or twice the more attentive may have caught the odd tremor in the ground (faint, perhaps no more than the rumble of a passing vehicle or heavy machine).

And so, when the occupants of the castle wake up this morning to find their breath misting in the air of their respective rooms, they might find it perhaps mildly disconcerting.

There's a helpful message on the network, should one turn to their tablet for answers:

To the residents of the MONA and associated premises:

Due to technical issues with the geothermal system, and for the safety of all residents, it has proven necessary to put all operations on hold for the next 24-48 hours. Efforts are being made to restore them in the shortest time possible.

Space heaters and portable lights are available in the main hall.

Sincerest apologies for the inconvenience.

-Chrysos.

Comments

[devotedtothecore]

[ It's a first (and a bit strange) seeing Break in only this much. He might regret his state of dress any moment now. ]

Yes. I'm afraid it's been necessary to, ah.

[ How to word this in as potentially undistressing a manner as possible. ]

Shut it down, for a little while.

[maddeninghatter]

[ Why didn't he put on his slippers, his feet are freezing. ]

Shut it down? Whatever for? Did it malfunction? Or are you doing some sort of —

[ From inside his bedroom, is a loud THUNK THUNK THUNK THUNK THUNK. Break didn't hear it. Or at least he is vigorously maintaining the fiction that he didn't hear it. ]

Some sort of maintenance, hm?

[devotedtothecore]

[ ........if Break didn't hear it, Chrys decides that neither did he.

(Whatever it was that fell, presumably it hadn't shattered terribly.) ]

Adjustments. To address the problem of the faultline shifts. [ Hopefully. He's not a hundred percent certain. ] It may last a day or two.

[maddeninghatter]

[ There's that moment that seems to stretch on into infinity, when one wonders if anything else is going to go clunk.

...

...

Except he's supposed to be ignoring it. ]

F-f-faultline shifts?

[ He is sufficiently distracted that he's let his teeth start chattering. He stops at once. ]

What are those, what do you mean?

[senseandcecilbility]

[Well, if both of them had waited longer, they would not have been interrupted by the sound of a chair and something heavier falling behind the heavy door, followed by a muffled yelp of pain.]

1/2

[devotedtothecore]

[ Increasingly evident, the un-wisdom of keeping Break standing there in his sleepwear. ]

Would be better you put more layers on before further explanation.

[ Chrys stoops to the floor beside him and picks up the rather hefty space heater there in both arms. ]

Here's a portable heater as well, in case--

[devotedtothecore]

....




[ That yelp sounds familiar.

Awfully familiar.

...

Please hold, mental gears in movement. ]

1/3

[maddeninghatter]

[ His face had taken on a wide-eyed, fixed expression, but —

Ah.

Despite his heroic efforts, Break can't help finally flinching at the sound of the chair, and the whatever-it-was, and the yelp. He should really go and check on.........

Except Chrysos is standing there with a portable heater, ready to install it in his room. At this point, if left to his own devices, he might decide to put it somewhere else.

Dignity versus heat. A moral quandary, to be sure. ]

[maddeninghatter]

[ He reaches his decision quickly, and... reaches back with one hand to click open the door. ]

Why, thanks very much! You'd better come in and get it hooked up and running.

[maddeninghatter]

[ Adding also, almost as an afterthought: ]

Mind the penguin~!

[senseandcecilbility]

...

...

...

[T-timid honking?]

[devotedtothecore]

[ ...

...

......



Ahem.

Flatly: ] Would the penguin like a moment more to order itself, perhaps.

[ Less an inquiry, more a suggestion. ]

[maddeninghatter]

Haha! More like disordering itself...

[ He swings the door open. The room is still dark; the midwinter sun takes its time about crawling over the horizon in the morning, and the lights aren't on, obviously.

Out of the gloom comes a noise: ]

Wark.

[ What's making it is not entirely clear. ]

[devotedtothecore]

[ Estimated probability that the suite of Xerxes Break presently holds a second occupant: Certain.

Estimated probability of said second occupant being human: Almost certain.

Estimated probability that the suite of Xerxes Break presently holds, at the same time, a rather large and demonstrably volatile snowbird: ....

....

Well. He is carrying the heater. And surely Break wouldn't put that at too much risk.

Mindfully, with all the care of entering a minefield, Chrys steps in. ]

[senseandcecilbility]

[As Chrys enters the room he finds: darkness, a fallen chair, bed sheets in disarray, and the already familiar thunk thunk thunk of a "penguin" trying to hide under the bed

[maddeninghatter]

Wark!

[ This is either a real penguin honking, which BY CHANCE muffles the sounds of the faux penguin....

Or somebody's ventriloquism. We just don't know. ]

Just set it down over there, if you please~! Near the window, okay?

[ That is, away from the bed. ]

[devotedtothecore]

[ ...

Chrysos decides, with all the due wisdom (and long-suffering experience) of a straight man in a world of preposterous characters for twenty-one years, that he does not need to know, nor have any outstanding desire to, and that the attempt at discretion in this sort of affair is actually rather refreshing.

There is a thump of weighty legs against the carpeting at the specified spot, followed by a couple of soft clicks, and a pair of hands dusting themselves. ]

There. It should take about ten to fifteen minutes to heat the room, if the door is kept closed.

[senseandcecilbility]

[The bed has become completely quiet. There is nobody under it at all.

Perhaps, amidst this whole mess, this "penguin" is looking for its more realistic counterpart.]

1/2

[maddeninghatter]

[ ...

He notes a distinct absence of smart remarks, nor the sounds of someone nosing about the room. You are.... not such a bad fellow, Chrysos. ]

Thanks very much. Look, I want to continue our conversation, but I think I will get changed first, and then come down to —

[maddeninghatter]

[ The truth is, of course, that there isn't one penguin in the room. }

Wark! Wark wark! Waaaark!

[ There are three. Red-eyed and baleful, they waddle their way towards Break and Chrysos with an air of impending doom. ]

1/3

[devotedtothecore]

[ ---BUT WHY

AND WHERE EVEN FROM



AND WHY ]

[devotedtothecore]

[ ---is the mental scream of an instant, as Chrysos Kineas, Central Core Engineer Class I and veteran of many battlefields of Ridiculously Unfortunate Coincidences, promptly yanks out his gun in one hand and a hefty pipewrench in the other, brandishing both with a glint in his eye as hard as their steel.

Men may flee. Machines cannot. And so hereby lies his honorbound duty; defend the heater at all costs. ]

[devotedtothecore]

[ Though that said, it does nothing for the cold sweat on the back of one's neck. ]

I thought you said penguin.

[senseandcecilbility]

[ Kevin Is, unfortunately, completely oblivious to Chrys' heroism, for his entire reality has become one single thought:

Please Lord, please don't tell me I lost my virtue in a room with Xerxes Break and three penguins.

That. That is precisely why angels can't have a romantic life.]

[maddeninghatter]

[ Break's mind ticks through the most likely train of events, to wit:

1. The castle temperature has dropped significantly, making it more hospitable to penguins, in general.
2. Chrysos left the door ajar when he walked in with the heater.
3. Break's ventriloquist penguin calls attracted... penguins.

He has tried very hard, thus far, to avoid directly engaging the penguins; they're sentient enough to bear grudges, of this he is certain. But now he is cornered, alas. He finds his cane and unsnaps it, revealing the steel of his sword. ]

Hellooooo penguins, how are you this morning~? Come and get plucked!