closed ► you would take the breath from my throat

[fujibayashi]

Date & Time: 6/23, around 5pm.
Location: Room 103.
Characters: Zelos (wilder) and Sheena (holeseeker)
Summary: Sheena's checking in like she promised.
Warnings: Tsunderes and feelings and failure everywhere.


[It's kind of late. Sheena knows this, but she doesn't really care. She hesitates before knocking quietly on the door to Zelos' apartment. Hopefully she can catch him before he's left for the night shift. If not, she'll just leave the food and go, and they can talk later. Or never.

But... there's something nagging at her. She hasn't been entirely reasonable with him lately, and this is the best she can do for an apology.

Her grip on the edges of the covered bowl tightens slightly. She looks to the side, waiting for someone to answer the door.]

Comments

[wilder]

[He meanwhile was eating the stew. Sure, he doesn't need food to survive and beyond the time he switched bodies with Ino, it's been a long time since he's even felt real hunger- but hey, he still had cravings and still enjoyed eating. Which hey, this is delicious so it makes him happy]

[But he'll look up at her when she speaks up, raising his eyebrows and looking half amused. Seriously Sheena]

- Uh, Sheena? I live with a healer.

[fujibayashi]

[She blinks once... twice.]

... Then why the heck are you still hobbling around?!

[Ha ha haaaaa she's concerned and there's really no way around it.]

[wilder]

[he snickers] Bones take time to heal, even with healing magic- and it was a pretty nasty break too. So even if the time's greatly reduced, it's still gonna be about a week to heal fully.

[And hereee comes the teasing]

Why? You worried about me~?

[fujibayashi]

Oh...

[FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF. She's turning red, just as he expects her to.]

W-- well, yeah! Y-you're my friend, so of course I'm worried. It's not like I'm the best at making splints out in the middle of nowhere, either. I thought it might heal up crooked or something.

[She hugs herself, looking away.]

[wilder]

[She always looks so cute like that....]

[But hey, she actually admitted she was worried instead of proclaiming no. That is really something...]

Ahaha, it was fine. As sexy as having a cane would be, I should heal up just fine!

[fujibayashi]

Ugh. You're such an idiot.

[She huffs a bit. She was going to say something else, but hell if she can find the words. She settles for looking at him out the corner of her eye, like she's deliberating.]

[wilder]

Whaat? What did I do?

[But you know, she's acting odd enough that he'll decide to ask]

Anyway, everything alright? I mean not that I don't appreciate it, but you cook my favorite food, you check up on me in person than over the tablet...

I mean, did something happen?

[fujibayashi]

[Sheena looks surprised that he even picked up on it. She's not used to people being that observant. But then again, Zelos really is. When he's not opening his mouth, he's always listening and watching and putting things together. How much of that is because of Cruxis, she doesn't know-- and doesn't care.

She tucks a bit of hair behind her ear.]

Ah, well...

[She thinks back on her conversation with Cheria. This isn't quite the same as trying some of Kaneis' cooking, but it's similar, right?]

I think I... haven't been fair to you lately. If... that makes sense. [Her fingers squeak a little on the table as she pulls her fingers back into her palms, making stressed-out fists.]

[wilder]

[he meanwhile blinks in confusion. While yeah, he picked up something was off with her behavior today- treatment towards him? Well, he isn't really so good at picking up what is good and bad treatment too well. Or at least, what is fair treatment to him]

[Because you know, you kinda need some feelings of self-worth to feel you deserve better.]

Huh? What do you mean?

[fujibayashi]

[Of course, she reads it completely wrong.] You-- you don't have to act dumb, okay?! I know I've been really mean to you. It was totally out of line. You didn't even do anything. I just... I keep messing things up, even when you're trying really hard. Like at the party, and everything after.

That's why... that's why I made the food. I was going to check in anyway, but I thought apologizing in person would be better.

[She frowns and tugs on her gloves, avoiding his eyes.]

So... I'm sorry.

[wilder]

[This may be one of the few times she sees a surprised expression on his face that lasts more than a couple seconds. Because honestly, no one apologizes to him. Not unless it's a formality to make sure they can still get stuff out of him]

[But this is sincere...and emotional...and honest and for stuff it didn't even occur to him as bad since really, so used to so much worse.]

[He's a bit at a loss for what to do, because this? this is an entirely new situation for him. He almost wishes one of his roommates was home just so they can explain to him what he's supposed to do]

I...

[Argh, come on. Think of something to say]

I never really...thought you were being mean...

[Sure, maybe cranky and a couple of the remarks here and there hurt- but who wasn't cranky with everything going on? That's all it was right? It wasn't like she tried to use him or kill him or ignore his existence or prod his problems to the point of making him lash out...]

[Yep. So very lost right now. ]

[fujibayashi]

[... Well, that's not the answer she expected, so they're even. She was thinking maybe he'd make fun of her or something, or go on about how terrible it is to wrong the great Zelos Wilder-- but there's none of that. Not even a hint. Once again, her mind's impression of him is completely separate from the reality.]

You... didn't?

[Her brows furrow slightly.]

But... I was treating you like you did something wrong. [She looks down at her hands on the table.] When I acted like that during the journey, one of the others would usually stop me before it got too far.

There's just no reason for it. [He's changed. Or maybe she's the one who started looking at him differently. Whatever the case:] You deserve better than that.

[wilder]

Not...really. I mean, I never thought they were compliments or something stupid like that. But it's always how we were, so...

[He shifts a little, feeling really out of sorts here because this is a new thing he didn't really understand at all. Deserve better? Ha...what a joke. He was lucky to get what he did get, and he knew it. What with everything he's screwed up and done]

[He pushes a curly lock of hair behind his ear. He looks down at the table, at his hands

To tell you the truth, I really don't think I deserve anything at all - so don't worry about that.

[fujibayashi]

[She's never heard him say anything like that before. In fact, the last time he even considered something similar, she ended up nearly throwing boiling hot tea all over him. This isn't cool. He might look uncomfortable, but she looks hurt and angry and shocked, enough to stand up straight and push her chair back.

If he won't stand up for himself, then she will.]

Just what is that supposed to mean!? You don't think you deserve anything? Wha-- why...

[He's lived in the lap of luxury his whole life. It's the complete opposite of everything she ever expected.]

You're a human being! You deserve to be treated like one! You deserve to have friends and-- and a life, just like everyone else!

[She stalks her way around the table. She might not be grabbing him yet but it's so very tempting. She'll just flail angrily instead.]

-- And don't even start with how you're a traitor! I know and I don't care. Making bad decisions doesn't make you a bad person!

Ugh, you're so damn stupid sometimes!

[wilder]

[Maybe she's never heard him say anything like that, but he's definitely said it. Even if it was in their own subtle ways, laid between jokes or when people were just out of earshot. Sometimes he'd say it just to see if anyone noticed, if anyone cared]

[And no one did. He had thought Lloyd did, but in the end he only saw him as not worth it. Why was now so different? Because he was dead?]

[He doesn't even know how to respond to her screaming. What was he supposed to do? Yell back how his whole life has pretty much reinforced these ideas? That no one treated him as human? That he technically wasn't even one anymore? He really didn't want to say any of that stuff]

[And so he crosses his arms tightly against his chest, looking away from her and at the floor- the old defensive stance. ]

So what? I don't deserve getting mean treatment, but I deserve getting screamed at that I'm stupid? C'mon Sheena, you really gotta make this whole thing clearer because I'm totally lost.

[Nope. Not even addressing the rest of that]

[fujibayashi]

[Wow. He just shrugged all that off like it was nothing. She doesn't even know how to answer that, because he's right. Going straight for the guilt, huh? He's always been kind of ruthless.

She doesn't know he lashes out because he's hurt.]

Th... that's not...

[She sucks in a breath, her bottom lip trembling, the edges of her eyes prickling in a telling way. She tries to hold it back, but her throat tightens anyway.]

You can't even look at me.

[She takes a step back, touching her fingers to the edge of her chin.]

[wilder]

Huh?

[Oh, she noticed that huh? Oh well- he'll turn his head and make sure to assume direct eye contact. He notices her own upset look - Did he go too far? He's not even sure. He feels bad, things had been going well and then...]

[Ugh, he knew he just ruins everything. He can't even figure out what he did wrong even, he's that horrible. ]

Oh don't worry, it's not like you made me cry or anything like that.

[He'll never mention that he lacks that ability even if he wanted to]

[fujibayashi]

[She's no longer angry, just sad. It... doesn't make any sense. Then again, rarely anything Zelos does makes sense to her. He's a good actor.]

... You really don't believe it, do you? That you're not a bad person.

[It's not the first time she's said it to him, is it? She can barely remember. They've fought for so long.]

I talked to your roommates at the party. None of them had anything bad to say about you at all. As far as they're concerned, you're a nice person and a decent cook. You work at the clinic, too. You'll help complete strangers without even thinking about it. You nearly got yourself killed because of it.

[She breathes in, then turns around. Maybe she should leave.]

You pretend that you're this... selfish coward who can't be bothered by anything. [She shakes her head.] Maybe that's what I saw before, but it's not what I see now. Everything you've done is totally different.

[wilder]

[HOLY CRAP NO HE WANTS TO GO BACK TO THE SCREAMING NOW. OR MAYBE THE HITTING. HE UNDERSTOOD VIOLENCE. ]

...Please, I only took the clinic job because I was bored and didn't want to do fight training. And I cooked...I cook because Allen and Sophie are so terrible they'd probably destroy the kitchen if they did.

They're just...too nice to say anything that mean to a friend of mine. I'm really not as good as they probably made me out to be.

[he's grasping at straws, he knows it. But they aren't lies really. He had reasons for what he's done, not out of sheer goodness of his heart. ]

[fujibayashi]

[Those sound like pretty good excuses, but Sheena isn't entirely convinced. She faces him again, hands on her hips.]

Yeah, you're awful. That's why you healed my arm twice.

[wilder]

[....]

[....]

[...Think fast. think dirty. What's a few more broken bones?]

Well, uh, yeah-

I mean, the sling totally blocked the view of your chest.

1/2

[fujibayashi]

[Sheena doesn't hesitate to hit him. This is not a friendly smack, either.]

[fujibayashi]

[She cracks her knuckles afterward like it ain't no thang.]

You definitely deserved that.

[wilder]

[And he is hit! He'll wince as normal because OW SHE HITS HARD WHEN YOU BRING UP HER CHEST. Though yeah, he knew it was coming]

Owwww!

These deserving boundaries seem very questionable to say the least!

[fujibayashi]

[She huffs a bit.]

Well, whatever. That's all I wanted to talk about. Want me to leave you alone?